All the Man wants to do is Show his Willy to the World

That’s it. There is officially no reason for the casual sporting fan to tune into Wednesday’s UEFA Cup final between Sevilla and Espanyol. Mark Roberts, a man whose job title is apparently ’serial streaker’, has been handed a three-year football ban intended to keep him from baring it all at the final in Glasgow. Can we get a similar ban placed on Sofia Loren, ASAP?

Roberts is prohibited from entering every football ground in the United Kingdom and is required to hand in his passport whenever British teams play in Europe.

Mr Roberts believes Strathclyde police are behind the ban, accusing them of “sour grapes” over his last streak at the Glasgow ground.

“I streaked at the Champions League final in Glasgow in 2002. I wore a tam o’shanter and had Brave Tart written on my back,” he said.

“I think the police up there have probably got a case of sour grapes against me because of that, but I can honestly say I had no intention of going to the Uefa Cup final or any other football match in the UK.”

Note the words “football match in the UK.” That still opens up the possibility that he could hit the Ryder Cup, Winter Olympics Curling, Super Bowl, Tour de France, Pamplona Bull Run, Miss World competition and countless other venues once again.

Alas, methinks we haven’t seen the last of Mr. Roberts. Here is Roberts in action during the 2003 UEFA Cup final between Porto and Celtic. He doesn’t have much of a shot but you can’t fault the effort.

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Category: Europe, World Football