Mario Gomez scores a goal with his Penis

By: Bob | November 12th, 2007

In order to keep our license and our spot on the internet, The Offside is federally mandated to show any goal scored by any penis from anywhere in the world. The effort above comes from Stuttgart’s Mario Gomez against Bayern Munich this weekend. Not convinced it hit his wee-wee? Let’s defer to Mr. Gomez for confirmation: “Somewhere between the thighs and the belly,” he said in a soprano voice after the match, leaving us all to consult our anatomy books for a definitive answer before reading his further explanation, “It’s big and it was hurting.” Ahh, so either he scored with his penis or with Oliver Kahn’s ego.



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Comments  

  • Martha |  November 12th, 2007 at 1:11 pm

    cornercorner

    I don’t know, I think I need ANOTHER angle to be sure.

    Posted from United States

    cornercorner
  • Andy @ Liquid Football |  November 12th, 2007 at 1:44 pm

    cornercorner

    Cue ‘It’s the only scoring he’ll do with his tadger!’ jokes.

    Better than Phil Babb, he did the opposite in almost very single way. He failed to prevent a goal… yet still whacked his knob off the post.

    Posted from United Kingdom United Kingdom

    cornercorner
  • Inara |  November 12th, 2007 at 2:55 pm

    cornercorner

    It’s big and it was hurting.”

    I’m glad that Mario answered what I’ve always been wondering.

    Posted from United States United States

    cornercorner
  • eusebia |  November 13th, 2007 at 12:21 am

    cornercorner

    Mario has a real big “thing”

    Natürlich kann man als mann stolz sein … vor allem wenn man so ein Hammerteil wie Mario hat ..

    schau dir mal den artikel in der bild an :
    http://www.bild.t-online.de/BTO/sport/bundesliga/2007/08/01/vfb-stuttgart-wappen/intim-rasur,geo=2234220.html

    oder gleich das buch bei
    http://www.euqor.de

    Posted from Germany Germany

    cornercorner
  • Snikkel |  November 13th, 2007 at 7:39 am

    cornercorner

    Erik Nevland from FC Groningen (Holland) scored with his penis last year. He scored the first, not Gomez..

    Posted from Netherlands Netherlands

    cornercorner
  • John |  November 13th, 2007 at 10:49 pm

    cornercorner

    This inspires me to yell out “Tooorrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!” the next time I get lucky.

    Well, replace “the next time” to “if”

    then replace “if” with “pretending.”

    Posted from United States

    cornercorner

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