10 Things We Learned From the FA Cup Third Round

Despite the ambivalence of certain lanky red-headed Reading strikers, the FA Cup Third Round went ahead this weekend. And plenty happened: Giant-killings, captaincy-stripping, comedy goalkeeping, own goals, the usual questions about Rafa Benitez and Sam Allardyce’s employment and all in all a very entertaining weekend of football. It was educational too, so here are 10 Things We Learned From the FA Cup Third Round.

1. Reading are going to win the FA Cup.
Just to prove Dave “couldn’t give two sh*ts” Kitson wrong. I’m now hoping Reading go all the way to Wembley, where Dave Kitson and his bad attitude will have to watch his teammates from the stands.

2. The FA Cup is the new Carling Cup
Arsene Wenger must be feeling confident, because he sent out the Arsenal reserves to face Burnley, with Emmanuel Eboue and Kolo Toure the only big names to start the game. But the likes of Niklas Bendtner and Eduardo da Silva got the job done and even Jens Lehmann got a run-out.

3. But there’s still plenty of magic left in the FA Cup
Coventry City ran riot against Blackburn Rovers, Oldham beat Everton at Goodison Park, Sheff United beat Bolton despite being managed by Bryan Robson, and League One Huddersfield beat Birmingham City. Timber! Meanwhile Chasetown (the smallest club to ever get to the FA Cup Third Round) briefly led against Cardiff City before losing 3-1 and tiny Havant & Waterlooville technically made it through to the FA Cup Fourth Round draw with a 1-1 draw at Swansea City.

4. No one at Liverpool FC has ever read “A Christmas Carol”
Except John Arne Riise. The Reds denied debt-ridden Luton’s request to donate half the gate from their game at Kenilworth Road, which is more than a little mean when you consider how insignificant that sum is to Liverpool and the difference it would make to Luton. Luckily the charitable Riise was visited by the administration ghosts of past, present and future, put through his own net to give Luton a draw and guarantee them half the gate at Anfield, which should be a cool £500,000.

5. Players on the pitch are more important than money in the bank.
Chelsea beat QPR 1-0 at Stamford Bridge in the battle of the billionaires, proving tat QPR may have more money, but Chelsea still have the better players. For now.

6. Mark Hughes was better in the FA Cup as a player.
Four FA Cup winners medals as a player with Man Utd and Chelsea, but a shock 4-1 Third Round defeat to Coventry City as a manager.

7. Man Utd should play all their games at Villa Park
Fergie’s men keep beating Villa on their home ground also have a knack for winning FA Cup semi-finals in front of the famous Holte End. So why not stick with what works and relocate Manchester United to Villa Park? All Man Utd’s London based fans wouldn’t have as far to travel and the atmosphere would be better than at Old Trafford.

8. Paul Robinson is the new Titus Bramble
Now that Bramble now spends his weekends scoring wonder goals against Liverpool, poor old Paul Robinson is now our best hope for tragi-comedy defensive mishap entertainment. He didn’t disappoint against Reading, catching Stephen Hunt’s cross and then stepping backwards while holding the ball out Marcel Marceau style until the it crossed the line.

9. Sam Allardyce needs to choose his seat more carefully.
Because apparently his Britannica Stadium view of Newcastle’s 0-0 draw with Stoke City was obstructed.

10. Ashley Cole is not captain material.
Pretty sure we already knew this, but apparently Avram Grant didn’t. With his usual captains injured or rested Cole started the game with the armband, but Avram Grant was so unimpressed he made Cole give the stretchy material to Didier Drogba when the African Cup of Nations bound Ivorian came off the bench.

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Category: England

Tags: Ashley Cole, Chelsea, Dave Kitson, Didier Drogba, England, FA Cup, John Arne Riise, Liverpool, Luton, Mark Hughes, Newcastle, Paul Robinson, QPR, Reading, Sam Allardyce, Stoke, Titus Bramble, Tottenham, World Football

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