10 Things We Learned in the Premier League

By: Daryl | September 15th, 2008

1. West Brom are the best sponsor-less team in the Premier League
We know this because they beat West Ham 3-2 in the big “your name here” showdown on Saturday.

2. £60+ million doesn’t buy you a win
It buys you an assist, and a sweet free kick. But Dimitar Berbatov and Robinho both tasted defeat on their Manchester debuts.

3. Titus Bramble: still got it
It’s been a while, but good old Titus Bramble is still a reliable source of comedy defending.

4. Rory Delap should have tried another sport
Take a look at both Stoke goals in their 3-2 defeat to Everton. What do they have in common? Rory Delap’s gigantic throw in, that’s what.

An impressive piece of weaponry and no mistake. But if your best football skill is your throw in, then you probably chose the wrong sport.

5. Zoltan Gera doesn’t read The Offside
Otherwise Gera would have seen last week’s story about Fabian Espindola injuring himself while doing a backflip and wouldn’t have celebrated his goal for Fulham against Bolton in similar fashion. Gera got away with it this time, but he needs to start reading The Offside regularly to minimize the chances of possible future goal-celebration related injuries.

6. Someone got Hull and Spurs mixed up
In 2008/9, Hull were supposed to be rooted to the foot of the Premier League and Spurs were supposed to finally break into the top four. But a look at today’s table shows Hull in the coveted Champions League qualification spot and Spurs all the way down in 20th.

7. There is no new Derby County
The absolute mismatch that was Derby County in the Premier League last season fooled us all into thinking there’ll always be a newly promoted team that gets spanked every week. But Hull and West Brom won this week, and Stoke put up a good fight against Everton to prove otherwise. Newly promoted teams aren’t necessarily outclassed, Derby County were just that bad.

8. Didier Drogba scares Nicolas Anelka
Anelka didn’t really look like scoring for Chelsea against Man City on Saturday. At least not until he saw Didier Drogba getting ready to come on. The site of the Ivorian about to make a comeback seemed to remind Anelka that his place in Chelsea’s first XI is far from a sure thing, and motivated him enough to do this:

9. You can take Jose Mourinho out of the Premier League, but he’ll still find a way to piss you off
Long-time Chelsea assistant coach wants to quit and join Gianfranco Zola at Upton Park. Chelsea want him to stick around. Latest twist in the plot is that Clarke was recommended to Zola by none other than Jose Mourinho. I’m sure Roman Abramovich will be delighted to hear about that one.

10. R.I.P. 3-5-2
Once popular in the mid to late 90s - when Liverpool regularly sent out a team with Vegard Heggem and Stig Inge Bjørnebye as wingbacks, and Aston Villa fielded a back three of Gareth Southgate, Ugo Ehiogu and Gareth ~~Southgate~~ Barry, the formation drew its last Premiership breath at Fratton Park on Saturday. Harry Redknapp sent his Portmsouth team out to face Portsmouth in a 3-5-2. The result? Some defensive confusion and a halftime deficit of 1-0. So Redknapp switched up at halftime to a 4-4-2 and tooik it Boro for the second 45. The result was a 2-1 win. The 3-5-2 died pretty young for a formation and will be missed. By opposition strikers.