10 Things We Learned in the Premier League This Weekend

1. Standards have dropped
There’s been a lot of praise heaped on Man City fans for respecting the minute’s silence before the Manchester derby, in memory of the 1958 Munich Air Disaster. Obviously it’s a good thing that City fans honoured the silence, but isn’t respect for the dead the bare minimum we should expect? If I was a City fan I’d feel a little patronized.

2. Kit standards have really dropped
The commemorative Man Utd jerseys numbered one to eleven and with no sponsor looked fantastic. A reminder of what football kits used to look like, a reminder that all the flashy new designs and patterns and what-not are just a distraction, a reminder that the best kits are nice and clean and simple, and also that we’ll never see nice, clean and simple design like that again while jerseys have to have a manufacturer and sponsor and then have to be altered ever so slightly every couple of seasons to boost sales.

/rant.

3. Steve Harper is better with his face than with his hands
Harper’s save of the day in Newcastle’s 4-1 defeat came not with his hands, but when Martin Laursen’s effort hit him in the face. Not sure how much he knew about it though.

4. Tim Cahill is keener to play for Everton than Yakubu
Cahill played (and scored) for Australia on Wednesday and reported back to Everton on time and in time to play in the win over Reading. Yakubu on the other hand was knocked out of the Africa Cup of Nations with Nigeria on Sunday (that’s three or four days earlier than Cahill, depending on your interpretation of international time zones, and not as far away) but then went AWOL and reported back late. His reward was an £80,000 fine and exclusion from the Everton squad until David Moyes calms down.

5. Jeremie Aliadiere’s accent is mental
The Frenchman finally got his game on this weekend, possibly motivated by the arrival of Afonso Alves. Aliaidiere scored for Middlesbrough and looked like the player he was meant to be when Arsene Wenger signed him. But his post-match interview was a warning to any young Frenchmen who move to North London. A Franco-London accent is a strange beast. Add in the North-East twang he could pick up on Tee-side and linguists will want disect his vocal chords for study.

6. Ivan Campo is serious about Bolton
It occurred to me when I saw the big haired Spaniard in action for Bolton this weekend that he’s now been at Bolton for over five years. A quick consultation with Wikipedia reveals that he joined the Trotters from Real Madrid way back in 2002. I expected him to play a couple of years and then move on, but he’s still there and still looking damn decent.

7. Distances are all relative
Matty Taylor can bang in goals with his left foot from 40 yards. But ask him to score in an open goal from four yards out and he can’t do it. Weird.

8. The default tone for applauding a referee is sarcasm
When Martin Atkinson awarded Spurs a 90th minute against Derby for an Alan Stubbs handball in the box, it seemed weird that Stubbs gave Atkinson a round of applause. Then I realized: he didn’t mean it. They never do. Refs do arguably the hardest job in football (except for Newcastle goalkeeper) and never ever get a genuine round of applause from anyone.

9. Sven > Fergie
The much-lampooned Swede has now beaten the much-lauded Scot home and away in the 2007/8 season. That’s all I’m saying.

10. All that complaining about the Africa Cup of Nations was pointless
Of the top three, Arsenal and Chelsea both lost important players to the Africa Cup of Nations, while Manchester United lost none. Yet now the tournament’s over, Arsenal have broken away at the top (five points clear now) Chelsea have closed the gap on the top two and Man Utd have dropped points and slipped into second place.

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Category: English Premier League