Premiership Predictions 2008/9 – Week 5

I think I’m getting better at this predicting business. Last week’s attempts at clairvoyance actually yielded two correct scores (Man City 1-3 Chelsea and Portsmouth 2-1 Middlesbrough).

But I also predicted that Liverpool vs Man Utd would be goalless only for Carlos Tevez to make a liar out of me within three minutes. Thanks Carlitos.

So still more chance of being wrong than right, but dumb enough to keep trying. Here are my predictions for week five.

Saturday

Blackburn v Fulham
Jim has predicted a 3-0 win for Rovers, but I see Fulham on a roll and Rovers in trouble.
Prediction: 2-2

Bolton v Arsenal
Arsenal did their old pass, pass, pass, don’t score trick on Wednesday. But Gallas’ late equalizer will have calmed a few nerves and Arsenal will run riot at the Reebok.
Prediction 3-1 to Arsenal
Bonus Prediction: Wenger’s midweek words will be heeded, and refs will impose a restraining order on opposition fullbacks, making it illegal for them to come within two yards of young Theo Walcott.

Liverpool v Stoke
This is where we learn just how serious Rafa is about the Premier League. Will he start Gerrard and Torres against Stoke? I say he will, and LFC will win handily.
Prediction: 3-0 and a first goal for Keane
Bonus Prediction: CSD on Liverpool Offside thinks it will actually be 3-1 to LFC, because Stoke “seem like sneaky bastards that’ll catch our back four sleeping at some point.”

Sunderland v Middlesbrough
The non crisis-clubs in the north-east have had quietly decent starts to the season. Plenty of passion in the Wear-Tees derby, but no winner.
Prediction: 1-1

West Ham v Newcastle
We’ll find out if Gianfranco Zola is really a proper manager here. And so will he. I predict that he is, and that West Ham win 3-1. Unless he’s not, in which case they won’t.
Prediction: West Ham win 3-1.
Bonus Prediction: Unless they don’t.

Sunday

Chelsea v Man Utd
It all seems to be in Chelsea’s favour doesn’t it. They’re at home. They just won 4-0 while Man Utd struggled to score. John Terry will play after being sent off, while Nemanja Vidic won’t. But it’s not always that simple. So for no good reason, I predict a narrow Man Utd win.
Prediction: 1-0 to Man Utd.
Bonus Prediction: Alex Ferguson to run on the field and rugby tackle John Terry.

Hull v Everton
Hull are where Everton want to be: 4th place. And they keep winning, even when I predict they’ll lose. Meanwhile Everton surrendered a two goal lead to Stoke last week (though they eventually won) and even conceded what was basically a throw-in. So now it’s time to back the Tigers.
Prediction: 2-1 to Hull.

Man City v Portsmouth
Imagine what Harry Redknapp would do with all that Man City money? He’d still buy other people’s cast-offs, that’s what he’d do. But what a team of cast-offs. Jermain Defoe seems to have hit goalscoring gold and Spurs must be wishing he was still on the books.
Prediction: 2-1 to Pompey, Defoe with the winner.
Bonus Prediction: In the long run, Man City will be a global power. But the Robinho signing will be seen as a waste of money.

Tottenham v Wigan
If Spurs fail to win here, it will be their worst start to a league campaign in 34 years. They will fail to win because Zaki and Heskey will give King and Woodgate nightmares and Wilson Palacios will trample Spurs’ midfield. But it’s not all bad, Darren Bent will score a late equalizer.
Prediction: 1-1

West Brom v Aston Villa
West Brom got their first win last week against the claret and blue of West Ham. But the claret and blue of Aston Villa will be much better organized, what with them actually having a manager and everything.
Prediction: 2-0 to Villa
Bonus Prediction: Ashley Young will play like the offspring of Pele and Maradona (if such a thing were possible) but Fabio Capello will just shrug. And then pick Stewart Downing.

If your own predictions are more accurate than the above rambling nonsense then you can gamble on Premier League football here. What are the odds on Fergie tackling Terry? Probably not good, but that doesn’t mean it won’t happen. Odds on Chelsea vs Man Utd here.

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Category: English Premier League