Ryan Babel’s Latest Rap/Crime Against Humanity

By: chris | February 18th, 2009

ca⋅coph⋅o⋅ny
/kəˈkɒfəni/ [kuh-kof-uh-nee]
–noun, plural -nies.
1. harsh discordance of sound; dissonance
2. a discordant and meaningless mixture of sounds
3. Music. Ryan Babel rapping

Fortunately it’s once again in his native Dutch, so it’s only lyrically offensive to those who understand a lot of extra vowels and excessively long words. Unfortunately there is at least one person alive who speaks both Dutch and English while also being subject to Ryan’s rap, thus translating it for us. Makes one yearn for the standard rap stanza featuring “bitchez, rimz, drugz, stripperz….lather, rinse, repeat”. And Off The Post decided to post said lyrics, which is equally as criminal.

From the 4 to the 5 to the 6 to the 7
Throw the mic in the ring and n***a you will stay in life
It is the R-I-O who take responsibility
Those n****z thinking it’s crazy that this guy taking over
Yeah, I told you before
Test your ears again cause you don’t listen good
I am confident, top fit and I feel good
Those n****z finding me dope cause the Rio raps too quick
Yeah game recognise game
And if you don’t understand, that will be a shame
I got lots under control sometimes we can have a laugh
I got my own world in front of me like the guys of Opgezwolle (Dutch rap group)
Lots of compliments for the stuff that I do
N***z with talent are never tired
This was a rap from the R-I-O

I don’t listen good – when’s Rio Ferdinand coming in again?

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Marlon

Well, you've got me there. Ryan rapping is both.
adas

I mean annoying.
adas

And Ryan rapping isn't offensive?
LFC4ever

M Al-Fariq - You didn't need to post the link twice but it is very funny.
Marlon

It wasn't offensive. It was a little annoying.
adas

Marlon, I don't realy know what I said that was so offensive to black people. I was implying that before said things were a result of hard work paying off. Somehow, I don't understand why Ryan thinks his hard work playing soccer makes it ok for him to rap. He's already got talent, let some other people have a place for their's.
Marlon

Adas, I must say, as a black person, shut the fuck up.
Scouser

YEAH, GAME RECOGNIZE GAME

You all know my name so I guess I'll just start it
Or should I say, start this, I am an artist
Of new concepts at their hardest
Cause, yo, Im a teacher and scott is a scholar
It aint about money cause we all make dollars
Thats why i walk with my head up
When I hear wack rhymes I get fed up
Rap is like a set-up, a lot of games
A lot of suckas with colorful names
Im so-and-so, Im this, Im that
Huh, but they all just wick-wick-wack
......................................
......................................

"My Philosophy" - KRS1
adas

How exactly does he, as he claims, rap too quick? That's an awfully slow beat. Aren't black people supposed to be good at rapping from birth? Like how they can run faster and jump higher just because they're black? Doesn't this put an end to all that racial stereotyping?
M Al-Fariq

He's also done this:

Type "Ryan Babel Circle Theorem" into Youtube.

It's worth a look!
M Al-Fariq

He's also done this:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v...
dp

Thing is, is it really all that different from Diamond Lights? All it is is footballers stoking their egos--and Babel's no different. This must have been a freestyle, because he actually has a nice flow in some of the songs he's done before--not to say the content has been any better, though; it's universally dreadful. I'm a rap fan generally, but it's stuff like this that makes me turn on Megaman 2 theme music to wash out my brain.
bobby_digital

*shakes head*

This was embarrassing as a listener. so thats tellin ya how untalented both of them are. call me what you will but i cant take anybody serious who raps in a foreign language or with a british accent. ryan shouldnt quit his day job anytime soon. there already is an over abundance of horrible rappers in this world, im sure striker/winger combo players who dribble with their head down and shoot recklessly from beyond the box are in more demand.. or are they?