Wayne Rooney can Beat you Up, while Sitting Down

By: Bob | September 8th, 2006

Add another glorious chapter to Wayne Rooney’s five-volume autobiography. The Manchester United forward got into a scrap with Blackburn defender Michael Gray while enjoying a night out on his town with fiancee Coleen McLoughlin.

Not exactly startling news until you read how Gray provoked Rooney’s anger and how the 20-year-old responded.

A clubber said: “It finally went off when he made the big mistake of suggesting a threesome with Coleen.

“Wayne whacked him without even getting from his seat. Gray hit the deck and by the time he stopped seeing stars he was removed by bouncers.”

Take note, Cristiano Ronaldo, Rooney can kick ass while still sitting down.

A report was not filed with the police. Manchester United will play Blackburn on November 11. The winner will not be awarded a threesome.

Category: English Premier League

Tags: Blackburn Rovers, English Premier League, Manchester United, Michael Gray, Wayne Rooney

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Comments  

• Luis |  September 8th, 2006 at 8:02 am

  
  
  

  Don’t think Ronaldo has much to worry about. I don’t think he would have much problem organizing his own threesomes. Besides, Ronaldo is much quicker on this feet then Gray.

  Posted from United States

  

• Laurie |  September 8th, 2006 at 8:18 am

  
  
  

  In my next life, I want to come back as Wayne Rooney.

  I want to experience what it would be like to go through life as one gigantic, pulsating mass of soccer talent, testosterone, and pure, unadulterated id.

  Posted from United States

  

• Chris |  September 8th, 2006 at 8:53 am

  
  
  

  As the story says, you don’t mess with Wazza cause he’s ‘rock hard’.

  Posted from United States

  

• Lulu |  September 8th, 2006 at 1:48 pm

  
  
  

  I can’t believe that I finally have some sympathy for Rooney. Gray sounds like an even bigger pillock than Rooney. Which is saying a lot! If Rooney didn’t even have to stand up, Gray must have been leaning at 45 degrees oozing booze breath all over the table. Ewwww…

  So, when is the next time they meet on the pitch? That could be a match worth taping.

  Posted from United States

  

• Nick Cantwell |  September 12th, 2006 at 12:34 am

  
  
  

  Rooney - suspended from International football because of a sending off. Rooney - suspended from club football because of a sending off.
  No wonder he has taken up boxing.

  Posted from United Kingdom

  

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