Q and As with San Jose Blogger Melissa

By: Laurie | March 5th, 2008

Yes, we equal opportunity here at The Offside. We do have female soccer-loving bloggers. Besides me, even.

Meet Melissa, the blogger for the all-new San Jose Earthquakes. You can catch her always-amusing musings on the team at San Jose Offside.

Favorite team besides the one you blog on?

Its no secret – Chivas USA

The player you’d most like to kick a ball around with ?

Well, I’d love to to hang out with Ante Razov and Carlos Bocanegra
purely for entertainment purposes because I bet those two say the most
ridonkulous things and constantly get into hilarious situations. I
would just sit in the corner and enjoy the show. Seriously though, I’d
love to chat with Jay DeMeritt cause his story is pretty amazing and
he’s doing tons of cool extra stuff besides football. Also, the guy is
not afraid to stuff socks down tighty short shorts and post pictures of
himself wearing the outfit on his MySpace page. And for that Jay, I
have mad RESPECT.

Favorite on-the-field formation (4-4-2, 4-3-3, etc.)?

I love lamp

Cats or dogs?

I have a pit mix I picked up from pit bull alley at the Berkeley SPCA.
When I got her, she was scared of everything. Now all she wants to do
is lick faces. She’s my alarm clock and the doorbell rolled into one.

Favorite non-Offside soccer blog (because obviously we’re your
favorite)

I’m into The Original Winger when they aren’t talking about shoes.

Last DVD you watched

Some terrible movie in Spanish my friend and I rented because we are
trying to learn Spanish. We tried to watch it with the subtitles off.
It seemed like a good idea at the time.

Who’s going to win the MLS Cup this year?

I don’t want to jinx it so I’m not saying anything but you can probably
guess who I’m rooting for.

When you were little, what did you want to be when you grew
up?

I still have no idea.

If you had to keep your eyes locked on one position (e.g.
striker,
goalkeeper, etc.) for an entire game, which would it be?

Midfield. I’m always watching the freakin’ midfield. And if things are
really bad, the bench.

Tell us something about yourself that most people don’t
know.

I once snuck inside the cooling unit of an abandoned nuclear power
plant. And yes, the inside does look exactly like that scene from the
movie Brazil.

The most games you’ve ever watched in a twenty-four hour
period?

Four and that’s only because I stayed at the bar all day.

Morning person or night person?

Night.

Favorite national team outside of your own?

Socceroos.

Favorite TV show to watch in reruns?

The Gong Show or The Muppet Show. I WISH The Gong Show was in reruns.
I actually spent an entire day at that television museum in Los Angeles
watching all their archived Gong Show episodes. No lie.

Favorite current player on any team?

I can’t answer this question until the Earthquakes 3.0 finalize their
roster and play a few more games. Until then, I think I can honestly
say this is going to be Sacha Kljestan’s year.

Favorite comfort food?

I’m obsessed with finding the best taco truck in Oakland.

“Gruesome Soccer Injuries” video. Would you watch or not?

Hell to the NO.

Favorite sport or physical activity to participate in?

Hiking with the dog. Spontaneity. Sarcastic banter. Long walks on the
beach.

Best game you’ve ever seen?

Not really a game per say. When the US hosted the World Cup, I was in
the South Bay and for whatever reason that was the temporary home for
Brazil fans. So the night they won, everyone poured out onto the
streets and had a huge party. At the time, I definitely thought to
myself: “I can get into this.”

Best pet you’ve ever had?

She’s snoring on the couch right now.

Favorite goalkeeper ever?

I think I’d be banished from the Bay Area if I didn’t answer Joe Cannon.

What else would you like to say about yourself?

My favorite Linux flavor is Debian. I write everything in vi and can no
longer use a word processing program. I’ve been working with an
art-techie group called Swarm who
built a bunch of aluminum orb thingies that roll around via remote
control. The next version will hopefully become self-aware (like a
school of fish). Looks like we are taking the things to Coachella so to
anyone else going, stop by our booth or whatever and say hi. We can
talk footie, we can geek out, or we can just hang out and get wasted.
Whatever. And I’m really excited to go this year and finally see Spank
Rock perform.