Torino = Palermo, Circa 2006

By: Martha | January 31st, 2008

Aw, Corini. Torino — AKA The Team From Turin Not Named Juventus — are a point off the drop zone in Serie A right now. They’ve got 18 points from 20 matches, including a mind-blowing 12 draws, three more than anyone else in Italy. They’re scoring less than a goal/match, and are in absolutely desperate need of firepower if they’re going to avoid the drop. So what are they doing to correct the situation? Trying to buy everyone who played for Palermo two years ago.

By my count, when the week started, Toro had at least four recent-Rosanero on their roster, all but one of who are 29 or older: Eugenio Corini (100 years old but pure class; wore the captain’s armband in his fifth game with the club), Hernán Paolo Dellafiore (only 22, on loan from Palermo), David Di Michele and Simone Barone. And now, over the past 24 hours, it’s gotten even worse (or better, depending on your perspective): Two more joined yesterday, in the form of Aimo Diana (29 years old) and Marco Pisano (26, on loan with the option to buy). Not only that, but the absolutely awful Andrea Caracciolo remains on Toro’s wishlist, as he’s the only striker they’ve been chasing who hasn’t yet signed with someone else. (In his case, it’s because no one wants him: He can’t score goals, and is a spoiled brat. He did play for Palermo in 2006 though, so he’s got that going for him.)

Now, it’s true that Palermo finished fifth in the 2005-2006 season, and definitely had some quality players during that time. But someone might want to let Toro know that it’s going to take more than just buying every player on that team if they want to stay up — I mean, they are aging, after all. Plus, some of those now with Toro, arguably, weren’t that great to begin with. Apart from Corini, who can play until he’s 50 and still be smarter than half the midfielders in Italy, and Di Michele, who is still incredibly skillful despite his tendency to pout and/or get involved in gambling scandals, adding these guys hasn’t done a damn thing for Toro — they need goals and attitude, not old legs that used to wear pink.

ETA: Caracciolo went to Brescia instead. Thank god for small mercies.