In Celebration of Ray Hudson
By: Daryl | November 10th, 2007
We’ve already declared our love for Ray Hudson here on The Offside, and we’re not ashamed of it. The GolTV commentator can liven up the dullest game with his uncanny ability to invent insanely brilliant phrases, and shout them out in his fantastic Geordie-American amalgam accent. And if he’s on the mic during an exciting game… then you better look out. Now there’s an entire website devoted to Hudson’s work. Hudsonia - The Wisdom of Ray Hudson is a blog cataloging highlights of the great man’s utterances, mostly from his work on GolTV’s La Liga coverage. Transcribing his words each week and also providing audio clips, including my recent favourite from Valencia vs Real Madrid: “Look at that! We know he’s a defender but he’s like a fish up a tree with this finish.” It’s a worthy project and endlessly entertaining. Selected Hudson highlights below.
“You’ve got to put him in chains, put him inside a bank vault, put him on a ship, take the ship out to the ocean, sink the ship, and you know what? He’ll still get out.”
“Esoteric. That’s all I can say. There’s more flair in this team, in this club, than a nineteen-seventies high-school reunion. This is a cabaret goal, again. And he’s Liza Minnelli. Perfect placement, perfect dynamic, perfect free-kick.”
“The ball’s trapped in between Raúl’s legs. Keita doesn’t matter what ball he kicks, he’s gonna get something.”
“This referee, man, I tell you, he’s having a Marge Simpson haircut day”
“We called him the bionic man earlier. Superman, Spiderman, magic man. He’s Macedonian, I know that for sure …”
“A goal is a dream with a deadline. And this one is a wet dream.”
“Metzelder hesitates like a three-legged giraffe, here. All the dexterity of a bull elephant, the big man, here, that’s embarrassing. And that is capitalised off beautifully. Look at Metzelder, he’s all a-wobbly. And Xisco goes disco.”
Category: 
Subscribe
|
Print
|
Share
      |
Comments
-
Am I really the only person alive who would rather chew glass that listen to Ray Hudson?! When I watch a match, I want to see and, if necessary, hear about the match, not listen to some guy spew nonsense in order to build what he thinks his his legacy. Honestly, I would grind my teeth down to nothing if I didn’t mute any game I have to watch with his “commentary.”
Posted from
United States
-
I would like to have the option. Watch the match with a normal toned down commentary or watch it Ray Hudson style.
I find Ray really entertaining. The following interview with him is also worth watching.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tJoJ6gPigZM
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5qDj3-tDHrQPosted from
Germany -
Ray Hudson is why watching La Liga on GOLTV is so entertaining.
The thing is, I don’t think he is trying to build his legacy. I think he is just nuts.
Would you rather listen to some American announcer that doesn’t know a thing about the game, or hear Ray Hudson say something about Sevilla’s team putting their finger in a dyke.
I vote the latter.
Posted from
United States -
Or the famous..braver than a matador in high heels with a pink tutu
or the rant about Tom Cruise
“And that’s why you see those beautiful tears of a man whose heart is bursting, Iker Casillas…(other announcer) ‘Tom Cruise?’ WILL YOU STOP TALKING ABOUT TENNIS PLAYERS AND STUPID HOLLYWOOD ACTORS, PHIL!! IT’S THE GLADIATORS OUT THERE MAN, NOT TENNIS PLAYERS! Tom Cruise! Prick…If he smelt a soccer jockstrap he’d faint dead away”
Posted from
United States -
God, I love him. I wish Ray Hudson could provide the commentary for my life.
Posted from
United States -
I watch GolTV because of Ray Hudson. I wish he could run the UEFA Champions commentary.
Posted from
United States
Comments are closed
Home 
