Carlos Alberto Gets A Nanny

This is not what you want from your club’s record breaking transfer purchase. After splashing out 8.5m last summer, Carlos Alberto has gone from phenom to enfant terrible in the span of the time it took to get from the airport to Bremen’s training facilities.

The most action Carlos has seen on a pitch is probably when he and Babacar Sanogo recreated the Rumble in the Jungle in training, earning both a nice cool down session in the stands the next weekend. Not that it would’ve mattered, he’s seen Bundesliga time all of once this season. Add this to all of his various physical and mental ailments and bizarre actions and Werder Bremen have decided he needs a babysitter.

Something happened involving Carlos’ thyroid glands over the winter break (which is light years long in Germany) that ruled him out of WB’s latest training trip to Turkey, and Werder decided they’d had enough with his inefficiencies. Unfortunately, they didn’t go with Hulk Hogan, which would’ve been both disastrous and the subject for the greatest reality show in the history of ever. Instead they asked Rogerio “Titi” Messias, a former player himself, to move into Carlos Alberto’s pad and help him get acclimated to both German life and, you know, German pitches. Things which he doesn’t seem to have that knowledge of. And Titi will be there allllllll day long. He’s the around the clock variety who will be more of a watchdog than a bunk buddy. So Bremen is praying that somehow, someway their most expensive signing ever won’t turn out to be a complete bust.

“We had hoped that Carlos wouldn’t have any more problems….We welcome everything that makes sense and has a positive effect on Carlos,” said Allofs, who revealed that the midfielder should commence training back in Bremen on Thursday.

I don’t know German, but I think that translates to “we’re desperate”.

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Category: Bundesliga, World Football

Tags: Bundesliga, Carlos Alberto, Nanny, Sanogo, Werder Bremen, World Football

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