Club v Country Consumes One Man

By: chris | March 27th, 2009

Club v country typically involves two separate and distinct parties trying to find a common ground in regards to player usage – it never happens, but they try. But Guus Hiddink has managed to turn it into a one-man internal struggle every time he steps in front of the microphones. His love for all Russian players and the fact that he’s coach of Chelsea wage massive battle within only to shake him violently and eventually erupt in a massive cloud of dust. One which usually dissipates to reveal Andrei Arshavin.

Let’s get this out of the way: Yes, Chelsea did offer Guus Hiddink to extend his association with CSKA London. It is not, however, as coach but as a consultant (not that you’ll find that little detail in a headline anywhere…). And by consultant I’m guessing they mean he’ll be in the stands feeding directives to Steve Clarke on the sidelines each and every weekend and occasional midweek evenings. (Guus is still “politely but firmly” declining any extension of his current role.)

Today Guus also offered up a suggestion for the Ballon D’Or, this weekend’s playmaker and next weekend’s London rival, Andrei Arshavin.

“One should show a stable high level of football for a long time to claim the Ballon d’Or trophy. When he gets fully adapted to the British way of life, such success can come, because he is not only spectacular but also an effective player.”

Which is all fine and well. Andrei is quite the talented lad and Guus is still his coach on the international level. Hiddink has every right to praise his slightly-off-his-rocker Russian superstar.

Only it wasn’t so pretty just a couple days ago:

“Andrei is strong physically and psychologically. He likes it in England. And he’s already become one of Chelsea’s leaders.”

And by “Chelsea’s leaders” he of course meant…

“What a slip of the tongue. Of course he’s a leader in Arsenal — but he would be doing the same at Chelsea!”

Do you get the feeling Guus has had enough of this whole club v country thing? Between spending his international weeks discussing Chelsea issues and Chelsea days discussing his international superstar, a cross-town domestic rival, Guus doesn’t seem to know which way is up anymore. After all, it’s not quite the same as PSV & Australia. (Mostly because PSV doesn’t play in London and Mark Viduka isn’t quite Arshavin.)

Everybody and their mother’s sister’s milkman will be expecting Guus to stay on at Chelsea past May 31st, regardless of what he says in the press, but at this point he might just say, “screw em both, gimme a cup of tea and book – I qvit”. Why? Because no one ever wins in club v country. The only possible outcome is a cloud of dust.