Danish Lessons in the Consequences of Wife Beating.
By: chris | October 21st, 2009
Getting arrested in the public spotlight is harrowing enough. Doing your penance in public, on national television, in the game of the week? A draconian punishment to say the least, and one probably befitting the crime.
FC Midtjylland’s Polish keeper Arek Onyszko was arrested and convicted of slapping around his ex-wife back in June (this, presumably, is the documented evidence of the incident). The very same day he was released by his club of six years, Odense, and signed with Midtjylland soon thereafter. His sentencing came down as a thirty days with an ankle babysitter, one which he was forced to play with this weekend.
The Copenhagen Post would have you believe this is the first time a footballer has played a game with a tag on his ankle, but we know this not to be true. Jermaine Pennant’s unquenchable desire to combine booze, keys and the inability to read was enough to win that dubious honor.
But it is the first time the happy happy Danish have been afforded the opportunity to watch a footballer whose most prominent bulge isn’t in the Sebastian Kehl region, which made it slightly big news. Also making it big news is that the game was against perennial big wigs Brondby, making it the Danish Game of the Week, putting him firmly under the eyes (and judgment) of the millions.
The game went off without incident, although Arek badly botched a goal kick and sent it right towards a Brondby attacker. A few heart-pounding seconds later, he saved the day and in the process taught the young footballers of the world a valuable lesson:
Don’t hit your wife and you won’t fuck up goal kicks.
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Category: World Football
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