Don’t You Hug Me

By: chris | December 10th, 2007

You know what it’s like. Sometimes the do I hug or do I not hug thing can be kind of awkward. Sometimes it’s clear you go for the hug. Sometimes a handshake will suffice, or even a wave when the person hasn’t washed their hands since the Clinton administration. Then there are the really awkward ones, when someone goes in for the hug while the other person isn’t prepared, thinking it’s a handshake-only greeting. Once it has been decided it’s a hugging situation, how close is the hug? Is it body tight? Do you leave adequate space between the bodies? How long do I hug? Can I break away before the 5 seconds? Where do I put my hands? Is that inappropriate on a dude, like the pelvis hug to the left? Thankfully, IFK Goteborg’s chairman has made the decision easy for his players: no hugs for charity.

The Red Cross in Sweden has begun running a campaign “aimed at helping the lonely through the holiday season.” Meaning: selling hugs.

“Our idea is to break through the isolation felt by many people all over Sweden … We want people to feel close and connected for Christmas,” communications director Johan af Donner told AFP, adding that the aid organization hoped to make 25 million kronor ($4 million) on its pre-holiday campaign.

The proceeds will be used to help pay for the organization’s work in Sweden, including paying visits to people who are lonely and in need of company, and for the recruitment of more volunteers.

Fair enough. Everybody could use a hug every now and again. Stig Lundstrom, chairman of the defending champs, doesn’t think so, and decided to pull his players from the charitable campaign. He doesn’t want his players to get cooties.

But IFK Gothenburg’s chairman became concerned that the warm embraces of complete strangers could lead to a risk of infection.

“The team has just begun preliminary training in the build-up to next season. It is an important part of the year and the trainers naturally don’t want them to get sick.”

I love this idea, eliminating awkward hug situations and cooties. Talk about two birds with one stone. Now I’m off to figure out a way to get old Stig to implement the same rules for my family Christmas parties.