England Offically Sort of Want Mourinho

The English FA have finally admitted that they love Jose Mourinho. Maybe not as much as Frank Lampard does, but pretty much nevertheless.

Brian Barwick and friends have now officially revealed that they’re ready to approach the Portuguese: Not to ask if he wants the England job, of course (that would be too forward), but to ask if he wants to be considered for the gig. Oh, for god’s sake, FA, would you just get on with it already?

The latest from the tight-lipped FA is that Mourinho, Fabio Capello, Martin O’Neill (who some say is Barwick’s first choice), Jurgen Klinsmann and Marcello Lippi are the names that “crop up time and again” when they meet, but there’s no sign they’ve actually spoken with any of them. Capello has said over and over that he’s interested, and while people claiming to represent the FA have contact him, there have reportedly been no actual discussions. And, while it was reported yesterday that Lippi is about to be offered the job, that’s likely just another hopeful lie from the over-eager Italian media.

While the FA is busy wittering around, Mourinho has apparently been putting together his plan of England attack with which he can wow the deciders, if it should come to that. (He apparently did something similar in an early meeting with Roman Abramovic, and we all know how that turned out.) According to the English press, Mourinho’s plan includes such revolutionary things as making players compete for spots in the team, giving opportunities to the most promising of the U-21s, and actually putting together detailed scouting reports for each match. England insiders, needless to say, are excited already. Said an unnamed senior England international, “With Mourinho as manager we would have proper organisation, proper drilling about opponents and the mental strength to win. The biggest difference is that we would go out believing we’re going to win, not hoping we will.”

Wait — scouting? Organization? Why, that shit is crazy! (I don’t know what’s more depressing: That’s this kind of thing actually is revolutionary for England, or … No, wait. That’s it. That’s what’s so depressing.)

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Category: England, Europe, World Football