Iker Casillas’ hands insured for €7.5 million

They are the lifeblood of bloggers and keepers alike. No, I’m not talking about hookers, people. I’m talking about hands. Without hands it would be much tougher to feed one’s appetite during a game and much more difficult to tell you that Spain and Real Madrid keeper Iker Casillas has insured his precious hands for a cool 7.5 million euros.

The policy, which is tied to a promotional deal Casillas has with an insurance company, is good for injuries that occur to his hands both on and off the pitch.

Groupama representatives jokingly asked La Liga’s strikers “not to shoot very hard” as Iker was presented with his insurance policy on Wednesday, while the player himself remarked, “I’m excited. It’s been fun, and I hope that people like it.

“And if I hurt my knee or my foot, I’m going to tell them that I hurt my hands,” he laughed.

For the company’s sake, they better hope that Casillas doesn’t get in the blogging business. The pain a mere hangnail causes can be debilitating. Not as debilitating as putting on cologne, mind you, but enough to make a grown man cry with each grammatically incorrect post. No wonder no insurance company will insure our hands for 7.5 million euros.

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