Sven the Stalker

By: Bob | January 12th, 2007

Drawing a salary of £6,500-per-day by the FA not to coach England, you can almost understand why Sven-Goran Eriksson is chomping at the bit to get back into the managerial game. How can you seduce secretaries with mere chump change like that? With all the tact that we have come to expect from Sven, he has been stalking Olympique de Marseille like the paparazzi trying to get a crotch shot of Britney Spears.

Eriksson recently attended a Marseille match because luck would have it he happened to be vacationing in Dubai. When asked why he was at the game and why he was taking notes he replied something to the effect that this was his normal way of vacationing when he isn’t hanging out with phony sheikhs and plotting his grand plan to take over the universe. He denied the speculation that he had been hired by Marseille.

This denial is a little more than interesting now that there are television clips of Eriksson that show him saying to Djibril Cisse, “”I am the next Marseille manager, do you intend to stay at my club?” as Cisse was being substituted off in Dubai Cup match against Bayern Munich on Wednesday.

We also learn that Eriksson was kicked out of Marseille’s training on Tuesday because he tried to talk to Franck Ribery. Again, little more than the actions of a man who is simply enjoying his holiday in Dubai Sven might say, but it is something that has left Marseille’s director of sport Jose Anigo less than impressed.

“I don’t know if they are really interested in L’OM, but if he is to join the club, he will have to do it with more discretion and class,” Anigo added.

“He has invented a new way to sell himself and to communicate – to sound important in clubs where people already work.”

It certainly is an interesting way to try to land a job. If you simply start showing up at the office each morning and take your place in the same cubicle eventually someone might put some work in your inbox even if you aren’t on the company payroll.