The Offside Fantasy League: When to Hold ‘em, When to Fold ‘em

By: Daryl | August 30th, 2007

Kenny Rogers gambler Managing a team in The Offside Fantasy League is a lot like gambling. To quote Kenny Rogers, you’ve got to know when to hold ‘em, know when to fold ‘em. Because the only things worse than having a player not scoring you any points is dropping a player who wasn’t scoring you any points, only for them to score a hat-trick the next week. Which brings me to Yakubu. Again.

When it looked like Didier Drogba might be injured for the start of the season I traded him in for Yakubu. With the Nigerian gunning for a move my expectation was that he’d be out to impress at the start of the season, which I thought meant goals, goals, goals, then big money transfer. I was wrong. Apparently the Yak’s idea of playing for a move was to pout on-field and make it clear he’d rather be anywhere but here, then big money transfer.

Mr Yakubu So Gareth Southgate quite reasonably dropped his star striker, and I was about to do the same. Then news of his £11.25 million transfer to Everton surfaced, so I decided to keep the faith. What I didn’t reckon on were work permit complications. Yakubu fell out with his Nigerian national team boss and so hasn’t been playing, which meant he failed to fulfill the basic work permit requirements. Of course we all knew this would be overturned on appeal, but not in time for the Yak to play for Everton last weekend. So now I’ve gone two weeks with only one striker.

So - Kenny Rogers again - I’m going to hold ‘em. Yakubu’s got the all clear to play, and could very well feature for Everton at Bolton this weekend. If he scores on his debut, and we see his trademark open-armed goal celebration then all will be forgiven. If he fails, then I’m stuck in the weird, psychologically abusive relationship with him. I should fold ‘em and get rid, but what if he then catches fire and scores all kinds of Fantasy League points, but not for me?

Those who kept the faith with Nani were rewarded with his goal against Tottenham last Sunday for example, while those banking on Dimitar Berbatov are still waiting for a return on their investment.

Am I getting way too into this, or is anyone else out there in a similar cycle of Fantasy League despair?

For those keeping track, I predicted Yakubu would score against Blackburn last weekend. He didn’t, obviously, because he didn’t play. But I did successfully predict that Mido would score for Middlesbrough in the North-East derby, so I might even be worth listening to. Maybe.

This week, if you’re going to tinker with your team, then it’s worth looking at the fixture list. Liverpool play Derby County at home for example, and it’s not unreasonable to expect the Reds to roll over the Rams. So if you’re looking for defenders you could do worse than Daniel Agger, or maybe even John Arne Riise, who’s a little pricey at 9m but could keep a clean sheet against Derby and possibly get forward and get on the scoresheet. In midfield Stevie Gerrard is 50/50 with his broken toe, but Ryan Babel could get his Anfield career off and running. Up front I’d back Fernando Torres to find the net again.

There’s also Manchester United vs Sunderland, where Fergie will likely teach his former protégé the fundamental principle of Premiership football: Expensive foreign talent usually triumphs over a ragtag collection of over the hill talent (Dwight Yorke) and decent, hard-working players who’d be more at home in the Championship (Graham Kavanagh.) Nani should be brimming with confidence after his backflip worthy strike last weekend, and could be about to hit a Cristiano Ronaldo-esque vein of spectacular midfield goalscoring form. Or… if you’re feeling romantic why not back one of Fergie’s cast-offs to get a bit of revenge? Take your pick from Dwight Yorke, Liam Miller and Kieran Richardson.