The Offside Power Rankings: March ‘09.

By: chris | March 7th, 2009

We’re back at it again with the monthly Offsise Power Rankings, but this time we scheduled some European action to make the voting oh-so-easy (it didn’t – we suck). Also not helping matters was the collective decision of many a big team to just take a game or two off here and there – lazy bastards – and thus throw us all into bouts of confusion.

Last month’s unstoppable force (Barca) met the immovable object (fatigue) and blew up the table, as it was always apt to do. So we watched as the chips realigned themselves, and this is what came out…..

But first, make sure you check out PowerPartners Unprofessional Foul and their latest Power Poll which…hey, kinda looks like ours a bit. Same ten teams even.

Isn’t it just beautiful when something works out exactly at planned even though you had no fucking idea what you were doing? Bless us.

And the rules for those that missed last month’s edition (shame on you):

Method:

We asked each of the team bloggers to submit their top ten lists of “who would beat whom” based on class and current form. Each position was given a point total (10 for 1st, 9 for 2nd, 8 for 3rd, etc.) and then we tallied the points. The rest is pretty self-explanatory. Basic stuff.

The only other rule was one could not vote for the team they represent at The Offside, just to keep out the hometown favoritism (mostly).

(And it’s not Europe-exclusive, thought it may look that way.)

We also added one rule this month: Writers absolutely cannot submit votes for ‘Guus Hiddink’.

(It was more a scolding lecture in The Offside Global Headquarters’ break room after I’d attempted to surreptitiously slot him in at #2, but whatever.)

Here’s the gist we got from this month: no one knew how to vote (including ourselves, once we sat down and opened the floodgates of our brains – alright, they’re shitzu’s trap doors). Lots of scattered votes, very few which could even remotely be considered something of a consensus vote (outside of the top team, of course). There were 34 teams, ranging from ManU & Barca to Toluca & CSKA Moscow. Lots of variety to say the least.

For last month’s rankings, go here.

Now this month’s rankings, with the number in parenthesis last month’s ranking, and those making their debuts rocking a (NA):

1. Manchester United (2)
2. Internazionale (3)
3. Real Madrid (4)
4. Barcelona (1)
5. Chelsea (9)
6. Juventus (8)
7. Liverpool (5)
8. Hertha Berlin (NA)
- Lyon (NA)
10. AZ Alkmaar (NA)

Best of the rest: Bayern, HSV, Milan, Roma, Arsenal.

There were some incredibly close races this month – in fact all but ManU and Chelsea had someone barking up their backside. A total of 23 points separated positions 2 thru 4 while Juve only topped Liverpool by a microscopic two points. At the back end, league leaders Hertha and Lyon drew even for eighth place, while AZ just barely nudged Bayern out of the table – and things may have been different had voting ended after Bayern trounced Hannover 5-1 on Saturday (twas a manic day, I see).

Next month? Who knows, but chances are it will look nothing like this, which is half the fun.