The Road To Moscow Resumes

Champions League Matchday 5a Preview

After swinging into the domestic leagues for a weekend it’s back onto the continental stage with the 5th matchday of the campaign upon us. Some clubs will be showing up with nothing more to prove and simply gaining some pitch time before the knockout rounds. Others will be playing for nothing more than a little bit of pride or the coveted UEFA Cup spot where they might have the pleasure of losing the final to Bayern Munich. (Full standings.) A preview of all the games just after the hop, skip and a jump.

Group E

Barcelona v Lyon: Last time these teams met things didn’t exactly turn out aces for the Frenchies. But that was then and this is now. Barcelona have lost their aura of invincibility (or, more accurately, finally sent it to Arsenal as part of the Titi Henry deal), replacing it with unrest in the Barca locker room and Lyon have begun making their annual run to the top of Ligue 1. Seemingly a different game, but Barcelona hasn’t conceded a goal in Europe yet and conceded a whopping 10 in all competitions this year. Add that D to that attack and you have a recipe for a massacre, again (all apologies to Inara). Just don’t tell Ronaldinho where the clubs are in Lyon.

Rangers v Stuttgart: Stuttgart wasn’t exactly cut out for Europe this year, despite taking last season’s domestic title. Rangers, on the other hand, has looked pretty damn qualified, with the only dropped points being to Barcelona (loss at the Nou Camp, draw at home). Mario Gomez is doubtful, which makes the task at hand all that much more difficult. A Barca win combined with a Rangers win sends Rangers through to the knockouts, and lifts the Scottish spirits just a tad after last week’s heart breaking loss to the Azzurri.

Group F

Man U v Sporting: For Manchester this one’s all for show. They’ll go through with or without Rooney. Sporting, on the other hand, still has some hope left, albeit only a dollop. If they can somehow pull an upset playing against 12 in Manchester and Dynamo Kyiv can hold Roma, they still have a chance. That’s a tall order for what will most likely turn out to be a really really closeup audition for Whiskey Nose’s latest Portuguese man crush, Miguel Veloso.

Dynamo Kyiv v Roma: In my most unbiased opinion, the Roman JV squad is going to spank those Ukrainian bastards. Actually, the only spanking involved has already happened. Both have lost whole squads to injury, and with a snow storm on the way in, avoid watching this game if you can. Seriously, despite Roma’s bella calcio, it’s going to be ugly. Even I don’t want to watch…that much. (Roma goes through with a W, and for that we pray.)

Group G

CSKA Moskva v PSV: CSKA and Russia’s resident Brazilian contingent are playing to get to vacation ASAP. They’re out, can’t advance, have a solitary point and their domestic season ended 3 weeks ago. They still have a shot at the UEFA Cup, but methinks right now they’d all like a nice, fat holiday. PSV can still advance, but will need a little bit of help being 4 points behind Fenerbahce in 3rd.

Inter v Fenerbahce: Argentina will be looking for revenge against the Turks after their shock 1-0 victory way back in September on Deivid’s Howitzer of a volley. A single point at home sends Inter through, and with Lady Luck always sitting on the Argentina bench, it won’t be too much to ask. Fenerbahce can grab advancement and the hearts of plenty with a win in Milan.

Group F:

Sevilla v Arsenal: Just to get this down officially: Arsenal is the best team in Europe. Cool? Cool. They’ve advanced, but will undoubtedly show zero letup as they’re still trying to maintin their unbeaten record in…everywhere. And they’ve yet to concede a goal in Europe. Good thing they let go of Thierry What’s-His-Nuts this summer (the guy was obviously dragging this team’s potential down). Gunner fans are also hoping this will be enough to quench Cesc’s thirst to “play again in Spain someday”. Thirst quenched, my friend.

(And this is where I say Sevilla could very well be the first team to send Cesc & Friends back to the locker room with an L this year.)

Steaua Bucharest v Slavia Prague: Steaua just isn’t all that good, ditto for Slavia even though they somehow managed to pull a point last time out against the Gunners. Slavia still has a chance at making the knockouts, about as much of a chance as I do of waking up next to Keira Knightley tomorrow morning, but it’s still a chance. (I’d probably surf right by this one if I caught it on the tube, you may wanna do the same.)

And that should do it, enjoy the festivities and melba toast.

The Offside Blogging Team can also be found at these Offside blogs:
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Category: Champions League, Europe, World Football