This Just In: Beckham doesn’t walk on water, sells a buttload of shirts

The Associated Press reports that David Beckham has indeed boarded an airplane to fly to Los Angeles. Speculation earlier in the week had Goldenballs either walking across the Atlantic or using the air in his wife’s head to power a hot air balloon. As of press time it was unclear whether Beckham selected chicken or fish for his in-flight meal. It is expected that this, and a million other critical questions, will be answered Friday during a live press conference where the international superstar will don the same shirt that 250,000 people have already purchased. Stay tuned for our exclusive coverage that you won’t find on millions of other sites, magazines, television stations or bathroom walls.

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Category: MLS, World Football