XI Reasons Why Football Is Better Than Football

Today is one of the fews days throughout the year where football falls second to American football on the global scene. In fact, it may be the only day. This year footy falls to a very distant second due to my hometown New England Patriots making an assault on perfection. However, since many would rather take in a Champions League Final than the Super Bowl, I figured I’d give my XI reasons as to why football is better than (American) football.

I. Once every four years, someone can actually call themselves World Champions.
II. Athletes in AF play 60 minutes which are interrupted after each 5-10 second burst with up to a 40 second rest and lengthy commercial breaks – yet some still find the need to hook themselves up to a tank of oxygen during the game. If you need oxygen mid-game in football, your ass is cut. Or sent on loan to Sao Paolo.
III. You can’t be 375lbs and play football unless your name is Adriano. (Alright, we’re done with the Adriano jokes.)
IV. You don’t have to worry about getting into a sweaty manpile and having someone grab your junk unless you’ve just scored a goal. At which point it’s totally cool.
V. The Miami Dolphins can’t be relegated and Derby County can.
VI. The longest kick in NFL history is 63 yards. Diego’s range extends to 63 metres. Eat it.
VII. No one outside of NY cares when the Giants play the Jets, but everyone cares when United plays Citeh, Celtic plays Rangers or Roma plays Lazio.
VIII. WAGs are celebrated, not discriminated. (Can I get an Amen?)
IX. Tiki Barber is nowhere to be found.
X. A passing percentage of 65% in football gets you benched, it doesn’t get you a fat contract and win you awards.
XI. You don’t get a 15 yard penalty or a fine for a great celebration – unless you’re Robbie Fowler. And then it only cements your legend.

Now we’d love to hear some of yours.

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Category: World Football